The Best Things In Life Are Free

~ Joyce Fields

There’s an old song with the title, “The Best Things In Life Are Free.”  The song is old, but that statement will ring true forever.

As a society, we are being “trained,” “conditioned,” “brainwashed”–whatever term you care to use–to believe that we should think highly of, and place value on, material “things”—expensive cars, designer clothes, designer shoes, jewelry, cameras, cell phones, video games, etc., etc., etc.

Don’t be fooled!

In that song, “The Best Things In Life Are Free,” the lyrics describe some of those “best things”:

  • The moon and the stars; the flowers in spring, the robins that sing; the moonbeams that shine–they’re yours, they’re mine.
  • And love can come to everyone.

Love.  That’s probably the VERY “best thing.”

And money can’t buy the “best things.”

How much money does it cost to listen to the problems or concerns of a loved one or good friend?

How much money does it cost to share laughter with a child?

How much money does it cost to give or receive a warm hug?

How much money does it cost to extend a helping hand?

How much money does it cost to share a smile?

How much money does it cost to encourage or support another?

How much money does it cost to forgive?

How much money does it cost to remind someone that they are loved?

See?!  The best things in life ARE free.

What comprises your “Best Things In Life Are Free” list?

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THE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE – September 27, 2015

The People In Your Life

~ Author unknown

There comes a point in your life when you realize:

Who matters,

who never did,

who won’t anymore. . .

and who always will.

So, don’t worry about people who are in your past;

there’s a reason why they didn’t make it to your present.


And check out the really good books at!  Get some for yourself or to give as gifts!  Watch the video here: 

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FOOD FOR THE SOUL – September 20, 2015

Food for the Soul

~ Author unknown

An elderly carpenter was ready to retire. He told his employer, a building contractor, of his plans to leave the house-building business and live a more leisurely life with his wife, enjoying his extended family.  He would miss the paycheck, but he needed to retire.  They could get by.

His employer was sorry to see his good worker go and asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favor.  The carpenter said yes, but it was easy to see that his heart was no longer in his work.  He had lost his enthusiasm and had resorted to shoddy workmanship and used inferior materials.  It was an unfortunate way to end his career.

When the carpenter finished his work and his boss came to inspect the new house, the contractor handed the front-door key to the carpenter.  “This is your house,” he said, “my gift to you.”

What a shock!  What a shame!  If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently.  Now he had to live in the home he had built none too well.

So it is with us.  We build our lives in a distracted way, reacting rather than acting; willing to put up less than the best.  At important points we do not give the job our best effort. Then, with a shock, we look at the situation we have created and find that we are now living in the house we have built for ourselves.  If we had realized, we would have done it differently.

Think of yourself as the carpenter.  Think about your house.  Each day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall.  Build wisely.  It is the only life you will ever build.  Even if you live it for only one day more, that day deserves to be lived graciously and with dignity.

The plaque on the wall says, “Life is a do-it-yourself project.”  Who could say it more clearly?  Your life today is the result of your attitudes and choices in the past.  Your life tomorrow. . .


And check out the really good books at!  Get some for yourself or to give as gifts!  Watch the video here: 

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TWO HORSES – September 13, 2015

Two Horses

~ Author unknown

There is a field, with two horses in it.

From a distance, each horse looks like any other horse.

But if you stop your car, or are walking by, you will notice something quite amazing. . .

Looking into the eyes of one horse you will notice that he is blind.  His owner has chosen not to have him put down, and has made a good home for him.

This alone is amazing.  If you stand nearby and listen, you will hear the sound of a bell. Looking around for the source of the sound, you will see that it comes from the smaller horse in the field.

Attached to the horse’s halter is a small bell.  It lets the blind horse know where the other horse is, so he can follow.

As you stand and watch these two friends, you’ll see that the horse with the bell is always checking on the blind horse, and that the blind horse will listen for the bell and then slowly walk to where the other horse is, trusting that he will not be led astray.

When the horse with the bell returns to the shelter of the barn each evening, it stops occasionally and looks back, making sure that his blind friend isn’t too far behind to hear the bell.

Like the owner of these two horses, God does not throw us away just because we are not perfect or because we have problems or challenges.

He watches over us, and even brings others into our lives to help us when we are in need.

Sometimes we are the blind horse being guided by the little ringing bell of those who God places in our lives.  Other times we are the guide horse, helping others to find their way.

Good friends are like that.  You may not always see them, but you know they are always there.

Please listen for my bell and I’ll listen for yours, and remember. . .

Be kinder than necessary.
Everyone you meet is fighting
some kind of battle.

Live simply,
Love generously,
Care deeply,
Speak kindly.

And leave the rest to God!

For we walk by faith and not by sight.


And check out the really good books at!  Get some for yourself or to give as gifts!  Watch the video here: 

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A TIME COMES IN YOUR LIFE – September 7, 2015

Clock~ Author Unknown

A time comes in your life when you finally get it. When in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks, and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out — ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears, and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.

You realize that it’s time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon.

You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella.

And you realize in the real world there aren’t always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter), and that any guarantee of “happily ever after” must begin with you; and in the process, a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you’re not perfect, that not everyone will always love, appreciate, or approve of who or what you are, and that’s okay. (They’re entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself; and in the process a sense of newfound confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn’t do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don’t always say what they mean or mean what they say, and that not everyone will always be there for you; and that it’s not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own, and to take care of yourself and in the process, a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties; and in the process, a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself and the world around you is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche.

You begin to sift through all that you’ve been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, and how much you should weigh; what you should wear and where you should shop, and what you should drive; how and where you should live, and what you should do for a living; who you should sleep with, who you should marry, and what you should expect of a marriage; the importance of having and raising children, or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you’ve outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with; and in the process you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing; and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a “consumer” looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don’t know everything, it’s not your job to save the world and that you can’t teach a pig to sing.

You learn to distinguish between guilt, and responsibility, and the importance of setting boundaries, and learning to say NO.

You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry, and that martyrs get burned at the stake. Then you learn about love. Romantic love and the familial love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship.

You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your name.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be.

You stop trying to control people, situations, and outcomes.

You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love and you learn that you don’t have the right to demand love on your terms just to make you happy. And, you learn that alone does not mean lonely. And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10, and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you “stack up.”

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK. And that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things that you want and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, and respect; and you won’t settle for less. And, you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you to glorify you with his/her touch and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect.

And you learn that your body really is your temple, and you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for, and that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline, and perseverance.

You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it’s OK to risk asking for help. You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time. FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it, and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn’t always fair, you don’t always get what you think you deserve; and that sometimes-bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions, you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn’t punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It’s just life happening.

And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state – the ego. You learn negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected, or they will suffocate the life out of you, and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to building bridges instead of walls.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself; and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never settle for less than your heart’s desire.

And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility. Finally, with courage in your heart and with Spirit by your side you take a stand; you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life that you want to live as best as you can.


And check out the really good books at!  Get some for yourself or to give as gifts!  Watch the video here: 

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Erect Your Own Private Force Field – September 5, 2015

Erect Your Own Private Force Field

~ Joyce Fields

What do you do when “crap” comes flying at you from all angles?  Or, maybe it’s not “crap”—just unpleasant stuff.  What do you do?

Judging from tweets on Twitter and statuses on Facebook, a lot of people take it to heart and allow it to hurt them or steer their attitudes in a negative direction.

That doesn’t have to happen if you have a force field.

How do you have a force field?

You create it yourself.  You put it up in front of you—from head to toe.  No one else can see it.  It has two holes in it for you to stick your arms through.  When something comes at you, it is stopped by your hands.  You catch it, turn it over, examine it carefully.  Then, you decide if you will bring it in past your force field.  If you don’t want it, you throw it back, diplomatically and respectfully explaining to the thrower that you reject what was directed at you.  No need for anger or a negative attitude.  Just matter of fact.  If they want to change it around and re-present it to you, that’s okay.  You do the same thing—examine it and decide.

On the flip side, if it’s something that you like or can use, bring it on in.  It can reside peacefully with everything else that you have accepted and brought in.

And, if you’ve brought something in, but it’s giving you more negatives than positives, just pick it up and put it outside your force field.  And keep moving forward.

You’ll notice a lot less stress, anger, hurt, and negative vibrations because your force field is allowing you to control what gets in and what stays out.  It’s helping you to be more objective about your life.

I hope this works as well for you as it does for me!


And check out the books at!  Get some for yourself or to give as gifts!  Watch the video here:


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Reviews for “The Best Way to Keep a Man is to Let Him Go (among other things)” – May 16, 2015

The Best Way  to Keep a Man Cover  060214

Available on and at!

Here’s what people are saying about “The Best Way to Keep a Man is to Let Him Go (among other things)” –

(NOTE:  The first four reviews shown below currently appear on  All the others were posted BEFORE I changed the book’s cover and lost them.  Thank goodness I had already copied and saved them in a separate document!)

Nisha says. . .
“While having an inside scoop, I have read this book carefully. I have not only laughed, paused in AWE, and tried the recipes to help me “Keep My Man!” Pap and Joyce are truly “ONE OF A KIND”…and the two shall be one. I recommend this book to my sisters and I have shared it with my six-teen year old to help aid her fair weathers relationships. This short-book should be Featured on the next Steve Harvey show, right next to TLLALM. Thank you, Mrs. J for being the voice of the wise (older) woman in my life.”

Katherine says. . .
“This was an excellent book!!!! Short and sweet straight to the point….I could not put this book down. I would definitely recommend. Lots of valuable information I will use to hopefully keep my relationship. I especially loved the recipes in the end.”

Milene says. . .
“Oh My Goodness! I love, love, love this book. I was going though a relationship in where I was LEARNING that “The best way to keep a man is to let him go” is the ONLY way it will work. This book was literally an instruction manual and I was reading it while going through it. I will read it again and again. Thank you Joyce & Pap for all of your love & inspiration, and also for helping me learn & grow while being AWARE its happening, which made ALL the difference.”

Ana says. . .
“I loved this book, great insight on a man’s mind and into a great relationship. It is written in a very reader friendly way, easy to understand and fun to read with little whimsical jokes and anecdotes. Fully recommended for both single and committed ladies that want a meaningful relationship :)”

Rasul says. . . (Rasul is a MAN!)
“This is the best relationship book I have read all year!”

Dorian says. . .(Dorian is also a MAN!)
“I liked the book. Really just common sense, old school ideas, the way people DON’T think anymore. We have think in a circle and like Mr. Rogers said “think of all the possibilities “. And if you MEAN TO BE MARRIED there are some things you just DON”T DO.”

Anita says. . .
“Wonderful Reading!! Bravo!! This book gives terrific insight into the complex mechanisms involved in developing and maintaining a healthy, long-lasting relationship between a man and a woman. If all of the good, sound advice is followed, one soon realizes that, in reality, there ARE NO complex mechanisms involved! This book was enjoyable and filled with rock-solid tips that I will be utilizing. I highly recommend this book to every woman (young and not so young. The recipes at the back of the book sound great, too!”

Niquee says. . .
“I definitely enjoyed this book. We get so caught up in movies, romance novels, etc. that we forget what really makes a relationship work! Not that those romantic things we see & read don’t ever happen, but this book really lays out clearly what we as women need to do to be successful at relationships. And “let him go” doesn’t mean break up with him… it means allow him freedom – don’t control him, don’t freak out if you don’t know exactly where he is all the time, don’t try so hard to change him. Allow your man to be himself! Make coming home worth it! And of course when you help promote this peaceful kind of existence, he will make you happy too! ***The recipes at the end of the book are also amazing! Joyce is quite the woman!”

Kortnie says. . .
“This is an excellent short book and a must read. A wonderful variety of yummy recipes. Great tips on how to keep a good man. And a great gift for any occasion.”

Rosa said. . .
“FANTASTIC READ!! Boy did I need this book! It has already helped me to improve my relationship with my man. He said “Thank you, Joyce Fields!”

Patricia says. . .
“This book was great!! What I certainly took from this book, was life lessons that I was taught from my mother growing up. And I’ve been married for 40 years to the same man. I recommend it to all of my friends, any woman single or married who are struggling to keep their relationship on track and in a good place. Mama never did say it would be easy it takes a lot of hard work but also so rewarding. Joyce, you have said it best because you are the example. Wonderful Job!!”

Lisa says. . .
“Practical Relationship Guide…and Story of Love!!” I enjoyed reading this entire book because it offers a rare perspective on relationships, from a woman who has been in a relationship for many, many years. Any woman, at any stage of her life or relationship can read this book and take away something important to think about. Thank you”

Chelle says. . .
“Full Of Wisdom. This book was really great. It’s full of simple wisdom that you can carry with you each day. And it’s a quick read, so you can pick it up and easily re-read chapters when you feel like you need a refresher. It also has excellent recipes (extra bonus).”

Ava says. . .
“Great Advice on How to Maintain A Long & Loving Relatonship!” Advice you can take to heart from someone who has experienced more than 40 years of wedded bliss! There are some wonderful recipes that the author shares with the reader at the end of this book! I’ve tried some of them and they are not only delicious but easy to make!”

Eleanor says. . .
“A Wealth of Information. This book is simply AWESOME!!! :o)
The relationship advice and experience offered from the author, Joyce Fields, is incredible. I especially enjoyed her “no-nonsense” and sometimes humorous approach to real-life relationship issues. And who better to get such a “wealth of information” from other than a woman who has experienced it and lived it for 42 years! I would encourage any woman, single or married, to read this book…you certainly won’t be disappointed. Thank you Joyce for sharing some of your life and experiences with all of us & thanks for those recipes!!! :o)”

Lena says. . .
“Insightful and Helpful. This is a very insightful book into the relationship between a man and a woman and the bond that can be made stronger when you have the right tools and attitude for success. And this book will definitely give you some of those tools and nuggets of advice to help you do just that. It is definitely worth reading and you will get a lot of good advice from it. I truly recommend it.”

Ruby says. . .
“EXCELLENT **************** – This is the one to read!” For anybody who is seriously committed to making their marriage work, this book will definitely open up your eyes. The best way to describe this book is simply “common sense”. “FAITH” also has a big part in understanding the book. Very easy to read, short and to the point!!! I send my sincere and deepest gratitude to the author, Joyce Fields. My marriage has been a lot stronger and my relationship with my husband has been even closer and I owe it all to you, your word of wisdom and, reading your book. You are my “Guardian Angel”!!! This book deserves a never ending star *). “

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